rodion | the battle of the feels

( It's easy to let the past fall away like this - and for once Shockwave embraces it. Just the two of them, the stars, and the stories. Nothing else intervening and nothing else to bother them.

In some ways they've both earned this break from the world. )

You can't simply say that and not elaborate, Optimus.

[And what a much-needed getaway it was. For all the work that needed to be done--all the problems that had to be fixed, Optimus needed a time to get away from it all. And for once, not having to leave to do so.]

I believe Scorpius is the one we are indirectly a part of. Named after a human animal known as the scorpion.

[A finger points up, to the tail end of it]

The tip there is the sun that our home orbits.

Scorpius. ( Not a fitting name for the constellation that holds their sun, but Shockwave feels as if he has very little room to complain. ) And its story, if it has one?

( He sounds pensive, as if he's already creating a story for why humanity would pick that particular animal to immortalize. Perhaps it had once been a deadly threat to the population? Which seems inconceivable - everything on this planet is so small compared to the organics he knew of.

Still, perhaps there's something he's missing. )

[Ah, now that's where Optimus gets placid. That hand holds tighter onto those fingers, his gaze never faltering from the sky.

But it gets a slight laugh out of him.]

You're going to find it funny.

[A bit of forewarning, okay.]

I'm certain of it. But that doesn't mean it's not worth telling.

( He wants to know, Optimus. And while most of his attention is on the stars above he can't help himself from sneaking glances at the other now and again. Not that much about Optimus has changed from the last they saw each other, and he remembers the changes in appearance from when he could not feel anything about it, but now that he can register an opinion on them he's going to have to start noticing them.

He likes the changes to his helm. That's a good place to begin. )

[Optimus wouldn't have noticed those glances if his life depended on it. For as observant as he was, as the Autobot head of command, he certainly couldn't tell nuances in people's behavior. For all he knows, Shockwave's just urging him to continue.

There's a soft vent, recollecting the story he'd looked up. Really, there was one reason why he'd keep such a myth locked in his brain--but Shockwave would soon find that out.]

There was once a hunter named Orion--[There we go.]--and he once claimed he could kill any animal that was on the planet, and thought himself superior. His pride caught the attention of the gods, or whatever higher being the humans believed in.

They sent Scorpius to deal with him.

[He pauses, as if waiting for Shockwave's commentary. He knows he's got some.]

( As soon as he says the name, Shockwave can't help the small huff of laughter that escapes him. Of course. But when the myth is explained more his grin grows wider.

And, oh yes, he has some. )

That seems particularly un-Orion like. But as you came first, I suppose their mistake can be blamed on not having met you.

( A wave of his free hand. )

Please, continue.

[His eyes immediately draw themselves to Shockwave. As if to say 'I KNEW IT'. He even leans forward, to emphasize that, with wide optics. That grin alone proves your guilt.

But at the statement, he leans back, once again casting his gaze to the stars.]

I like to think it's just pure coincidence. Now, the creature's tail can poison a man and kill him. So when Orion went up against it, he was killed. The gods immortalized both Orion and Scorpius in the sky, one in the summer and one in the winter.

[His hand gestures up, to the constellation.]

The humans joke that it is because Orion is running away from the beast that killed him.

( Coincidence? Most likely, but it won't stop Shockwave from grinning at him and being beyond amused at the entire thing. He's not sorry, Optimus. And when he speaks again his tone is beyond amused. )

Ah, see, now I know you're not alike at all. You would never have been killed so easily. And I think Primus has better things to do than let us live even longer in the stars.

( He's not the most religious bot around, focusing his efforts on science rather than belief. It seems strange to think there are some who can still believe after their war, who would want to think that. Still, he isn't one to judge. )

[See, this is what he was talking about. You and that smile of yours that says nothing but means so much. Those ear pieces swivel back a fraction as he listens though, listening to the Senator's words.

Which make him think, oddly enough.]

You think so? I suppose your faith in me is rather comforting, in case I go up against any scorpions on this planet.

[Aw look, he's trying to make a joke.]

I didn't think you put much emphasis into...mythos like Primus.

( It's a good attempt, and it gets a low rumble of laughter from Shockwave. )

My hero.

( He turns fully towards Optimus, the hand that isn't still clasped in Optimus' hand moving to gently brush the ear decorations gently. He can't resit it - with every twitch his attention is brought back to them. )

You'd be right. But myths are a way of explaining the world around us, of putting a name to the things we don't understand, or can't yet explain. Do I think the stories are true? No. But I know that we are gifted with the ability to change our shape like no other species out there, and the ways we seek to explain that are just as important as the fact we can at all.

[It may have been a joke, but Optimus's eyes cast away a moment at the 'hero', bit. If anything, he felt like he'd failed Shockwave. Left him at the hands of the Institute. To him, that was anything but a hero.

He doesn't have long to dwell on that, though, as he feels those fingers touch his ear piece, it twitching in reply. They were more sensitive to gentle touch than he'd like to admit, and his distant eyes change to wide ones.

But he doesn't pull away, for as surprising as it was to him, it's got him in a trance, head tilting towards him like a dog. Involuntarily of course.]

I had a feeling you'd come up with an answer like that--A way to be both wrong and right at the same time. Sometimes, I'd like to think there is some kind of higher out there to explain things. You know I'm not the religious type, but for...convenience. Put a face to something when it goes wrong.

[Ironic.]

It's a double-edged sword no matter what.

Edited 2014-07-09 01:00 (UTC)

( And Shockwave would remind him that he went willingly, and wouldn't change his decision if it meant saving Roller's life. What he became was not Optimus' fault. If anyone, it was his own for not fighting through the Shadowplay before.

Hedging his bets that physical affection is something the Prime rarely experience, he keeps at it. After all, Optimus hasn't registered any objection to it. )

Then we would never learn from our mistakes. If the Guiding Hand exists, they've done us a favor by leaving us here alone to make our own way in the universe. ( But! ) There's more than two constellations in these skies, Optimus. Surely you know the story for another.

[It'd been a guilt he'd carried for so long. Something he should have accounted for, really. There were nights where he would go over that night again and again in his head, seeing what went wrong. He'd done that with a lot of mistakes. It made for a very depressing wartime, to be honest.

Here, he was just starting to recover. To let those wounds heal. Shockwave trusted him, and he wouldn't mess it up a second time.

But the caressing of his ear piece causes his head to dip lower, eyes dimming as they cast themselves back to the Senator. He knows you're doing this on purpose now, Shockwave. You're not being incredibly subtle about it.]

Right. I suppose I'll have to take a look at the sky.

[Just...in a moment.]

( Subtle and Shockwave have never really been on speaking terms before, and they're certainly not going to start.

With a fond smile at Optimus, he stops - but not before taking a moment to appreciate how at ease the other looks. His plan, unfortunately, means letting go of his Prime and moving away, but he makes up for the sudden lack of physical contact by grabbing Optimus' shoulder. )

Here.

( There's a gentle pressure as Shockwave tugs at him, and if Optimus doesn't resist he'll find himself with his head in Shockwave's lap - the ex-Senator's hands back on the ear piece. )

[The moment Shockwave stops, Optimus's eyes brighten back up, as if popping out of that spell the senator had over him. The ear pieces though, seem to respond as well, slightly twitching.

No sooner had he pulled away, than the hand was on his shoulder, gently but firmly pressing down. He doesn't resist it, by now trusting Shockwave enough to know what he was doing. And sure enough, he finds his helm in the other's lap, eyes looking up at the sky.]

This works.

[There's an amused tone out of that voice as his eyes flicker a moment, letting that feeling sink in.]

Now...you wanted to know more constellations.

I did, as it so happens.

( His gaze is on Optimus rather than the stars, voice equal parts amused and fond. One hand continues to run over the ear pieces - faint ghosting touches - while the other goes to rest over the Autobot symbol on the shoulder closest to him.

Time spent like this is something he'd never have allowed himself to consider before. They would have been too busy, even if things had gone to plan - Optimus would have been Prime and he would have been there to guide and advise should he have been wanted. This? This is a flight of fancy that he cannot begrudge himself or Optimus. )

[He takes a moment to relish in that feeling again--Shockwave's gentle touch, fingers trickling along the seams of his ear pieces. Maybe it was the many years of war, but little touches like that were so foreign. Something so gentle was rare.

A soft, content hum erupts from his engine as he focuses back on the sky, although is mind is softly multitasking between it and the one holding him. Either way, he puts up a good front.]

If you look past Scorpius, you will see five stars in a cluster. They're not overly bright, but they're noticeable. They form a pentagon-shape--humans seem to see a set of scales from this called Libra.

The scales of balance.

( Reluctantly Shockwave tears his gaze from Optimus back up to the sky, optics focusing in on the group of stars he's referring to. He can't see it as scales anymore than he could see an organic animal out of the last one, but he'll take Optimus' word for it.

He's far too wrapped up in this - the physical closeness he'd never had with Orion, although he'd certainly desired it - to care overmuch what humans think scales look like. Instead his mind is mostly focused on the weight of Optimus' helm in his lap and the feeling of his plating under his hand, the slight rise of the faction symbol pressed against Shockwave's palm. )

And what do they weigh?

( For a moment he thinks they judge good deeds against those that harm, and Shockwave finds himself thankful that their race has such long lives in which to make amends. )

[It doesn't matter too much to Optimus--really, the stargazing is just an excuse to spend time with Shockwave. His knowledge of the subject is limited to the astrological signs, as they were what was most common in the searches for pinpointing different systems. Where to expect ships to come in.

Constellations were unintended roadmaps.

He can feel the slight stroke of those delicate fingers, the way they ghost over that plating before finally breaking eye contact, engine 'clearing' itself before he focused again.

Right...Libra.]

They weigh fairness and civility, and belong to a god of justice and truth.

Strange that they'd attempt to immortalize the scales instead of the god.

( If there was one thing that they had now it was time. An excuse this might be to simply spend unquestioned hours in each other's company didn't make it any less enjoyable or informative. Both with what humanity sought to preserve and protect and what Optimus made note to remember.

Although he would never let the other live down his reluctance to admit that there was a constellation for him. Not until his processor failed, and Shockwave had lived a very long time. Six million years and more - there's only one or two left that can claim that.

Which sobers him more than he thought he would. His contemporaries, as deserving of their final fate as most of them were, were still his contemporaries. )

Edited 2014-07-19 01:42 (UTC)

Perhaps it's easier than recreating a human.

[Then again, there were plenty of human constellations. And humans were a creative sort. His reason could still stand, though--if it weren't Shockwave he was talking to.

And in a way, if Shockwave did never let him live this down, Optimus would be alright with it. It meant that the senator would be around him, and after so many years of thinking he'd failed him...he'd done something right.

He'd saved him, and he wanted to keep it that way. A little teasing was welcomed, even if he didn't outright say it.]

If there's one thing I've known, it's that humans are not conventional thinkers a lot of the time. They will always surprise you.

( He doesn't remember surprise in his interactions with them. Four million years and it's a gaping hole of emotionless images; the majority of his long life spent doing things for which he feels revulsion and regret. But he can feel them. And whatever emotions they invoke, it's proof that he is back to who he was, that the parts of him that were stripped away have resurfaced. )

They are certainly a creative species. ( He pauses, fingers settling to stroke Optimus' helm rather than the ear pieces. ) You admire them.

( A statement, rather than a question. Shockwave understands the Prime's reluctance to drag them all back to Earth in the first place - he cannot think of one good thing that happened, except the end of their war. They'd destroyed worlds - Shockwave had done his part in that - and yet this one still stood.

It survived, and it continues to defy them. )

[Something Optimus is thankful for, to be honest. There was worry that he wouldn't get Shockwave back. That he couldn't overcome the Shadowplay. But he'd always underestimated the senator--he had strength, if not physically, mentally. Far more than he would admit to having sometimes. Something he'd always admired about him.]

I do. Despite their size, they are resilient, and even resourceful. They've evolved to adapt to their surrounding. Everything their planet--or anything extra-terrestrial that's thrown at them...

They rethink, and survive.

[It's why he didn't want to come back, true. He respected them too much as a species to bring them back into the war. They'd already suffered to much without a choice in the matter.

Another thing to stack upon that list of guilt.]

( There's a thoughtful noise at the back of Shockwave's throat when Optimus finishes. He's yet to see that first hand, but he doesn't doubt the truth of the statement. )

Unlike Cybertronians, hmm? ( Only a race incapable of change would drag out a civil war for four million years. Shockwave had such high hopes for their race - war be damned - and to find it fallen so short of what he wanted hurt once he was capable of realizing it. But he didn't hold it against Optimus, who did his best and led their kind out the other side. ) Perhaps we could learn from them, given enough time.

( His hands go back to running down Optimus' ear pieces, a soothing, gentle touch like he hasn't been capable of giving in millions of years. )

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